As I was perousing the blogs in this here blogring, I came across a line which sounded familiar... Sometime in late 2000 or early 2001 during my senior year of college, I think I received the following as a forwarded email (or something...) and I found it amusing. And after much deleting and the adding of my own political sarcasm, I posted it as stall reading in the freshman women's bathrooms (I was their R.A.) Unfortunately nobody got my humor. But I was entertained at least.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
GEORGE W. BUSH: Hispanically speaking, folks like the chicken here should be able to cross the road via their own hard work.
AL GORE: I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Although recounts have shown that indeed there were more chickens than what has been projected, the road must go forth.
RALPH NADER: The chicken's habitat on the far side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV crushed it.
RUSH LIMBAUGH: I the chicken was crossing the road to get a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.
P.E.T.A. SPOKESPERSON: What business is it of yours why the chicken crossed the road? The chicken had every right to cross the road, more right than you have, since the chicken never murdered or enslaved an animal for its own pleasure.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
DAD: The chicken crossed the road, barefoot, uphill both ways, in the snow.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
RONALD REAGAN: What chicken?
KEN STARR: The chicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he cooperates fully with our investigation. Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to reach the other side of the road until our investigation has been completed.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2001, which will not only cross roads, but will also lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. Could you define chicken please?
LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.
THE BIBLE: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road". And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing. | 
